Magical Monday Mayhem

This picture is truly hysterical... I dare you to try looking at it for thirty seconds without laughing... seriously.. try it.. can't do it can you? I know right!?! Been trying to put my finger on it all morning, but I don't know what it is about it that is so funny. Maybe that everything about it is trying too hard to be oddly romantic or dare I say sexy... oh sorry I have to stop and laugh again... wait.. maybe it's that he looks about as awkward about having it taken as I feel looking at it... look at his face... he's on the verge of laughing with you...

Anyhow this is not about the picture, it's about what it represents.. and that is ABC's magical gift which allows them to turn boring, droopy Monday's into exciting, nail biting (yes, I'm aware hopelessly edited and super-cliche) reality show centerpieces of the week. In fact in my case, Monday's are the highlight of my TV week.. Beginning with yet another one of ABC's miracles "Secret Life of the American Teenager" which is super-cheesy, but that I'm incurably addicted to.. (darn you Brenda Hampton, you get me every time), followed by the Bachelor and then if I'm lucky, since they skip weeks erratically, the treat of a new episode of The Big Bang Theory on CBS. So all in all my Mondays nights are pretty great.

I've particularly enjoyed this season of the Bachelor, as I was not of fan of Deanna, Jason, or Jillian, so I've spent a few seasons only half watching and not really feeling the desire to root for anyone. And in truth I had doubts going in about my interest in this season. Although I always liked Jake, I didn't know if his bore-snore of a persona could carry the show, boy was I wrong!

We've had a scandal packed season and it ain't over yet. Tomorrow will be the finale and better yet, the "After the Final Rose" episode, which is when all the shizz really hits the fan. I'm pretty excited, but wanted to give my predictions before the big day... note that I have done my best to stay away from realitysteve.com this season, since as much as I love him, he's begun ruining the seasons for me... so this is my personal, untainted by the media, thoughts on what is come:

I think he will choose Vienna.. Tenley's sweet, but I think he's just been hoping that would result in real chemistry, since logically he knows she would be good for him, but it simply hasn't... plus could you imagine those two together for real? I'm yawning just thinking about it... However I think he still has very strong feelings for Ali and if he hasn't already, will eventually try to work things out with her. Vienna is not his happily ever after gal.. how long it takes him to figure that out is the question... my guess is they've already called it quits...

The After the Rose episode will consist of one of two scenarios.. either we'll see him pull a Mesnick and straight up ask Ali to take him back right there on the air and Gia will be announced as the new bachelorette... OR ...ABC will exude it's genius and do the unthinkable.. announce Ali as the new Bachelorette, knowing that at some point near the end of her season she will get a phone call from a certain pilot whose discovered he's madly in love with her and would like another chance. She'll choose him and they'll live happily ever after... At least until next season that is...

Those are my picks.. Stay Tuned...

WARNING: High Maintenance Overload

As a rule of thumb I tend to think that when judging whether or not someone has had too much plastic surgery it's best to rule them completely out if they look like a bad wax-figure of themselves... but in this case I think it may go WAY beyond that. Let's note that the photo to my right is not Charo, but the 2.0 version of what used to be a vibrant, fresh (granted CRAZY) but otherwise lovely 23 year old woman. Some of you might say.. "oh she looks fine, so she had a little work done, ehh what could it hurt." And there was a time I might've agreed. That time however was long ago when we were unaware of the life span of plastic surgery. It's a relatively new thing you know, all this plucking and tucking, and although I'm a fan of keeping yourself happy and youthful this is serious overkill. Many people don't realize that plastic surgeries aren't a one time deal.. they require upkeep and once you've had it done, the after-effects are bound with you for the long haul. Some of them last as long as ten years without needing any updating, while others, not half that. To refresh your memory, the photo on your right is the result of 16, count 'em SIXTEEN mini-surgeries. Do the math... that means, if she lives to be 75, she'll have to have as few as 80 more procedures to continue looking like a plastic version of herself. Not to mention that when you go to a plastic surgeon's office, gravity and all it's ill-effects are not checked at the door. I shudder to think what is yet to come for this face and dear God help me that chest. I wish I could make more fun of her for this, but really we all knew she was a little bit off her rocker to begin with and cumulatively Speidi is one for the record books in terms of being attention starved, but I really just feel sorry for her. My question is... Does this plastic surgeon do double duty as a fertility specialist? Because he and the guy who implanted Octomom with 8 kids, when she already had six at home, must be at least golf buddies..

How Redneck Do You Have to Be to Need a Box of Wine That Doubles As a Drinking Game?

So this blog is mostly about pop-culture, but I make no secret of my love for UK Basketball, as I am a Kentucky native and have grown up immersed in all things blue... And in truth I suppose sports, even the college variety, can be as much a part of pop-culture as anything else. Add to that the fact that this commercial was so funny that it was next to impossible for me to pass up posting. So... today while preparing to watch the UK vs. TN game, local programming is running a pre-game show showcasing scholastic players and without fail there are a multitude of low-budget local commercials thrown in at every possible break so the advertisers can get their air time. Normally I'd mute the TV or if possible fast forward to the next bit, but today by God's grace we were watching when this magically delicious snip-it took center-stage... it really speaks for itself... so enjoy...

GooGoo Gaga.. Baby Need a Chill Pill?

There are a bajillion things one could say about Lady Gaga. That's she's.. I don't know... say a lunatic... that she has an unnatural need for attention... and of course all the jazz about her androgynous, near comic book level get-ups. Call me crazy, but wasn't Madonna doing an '80's version of all this in... well the 80's..? Given that Madame Gaga takes it quite farther than a tin-man style bra ever thought about going, but nonetheless we've seen this sort of outta the box, walking art thing a million times before with a variety of divas, who as Cher once said at a concert during her Believe Tour "have shoes older than these gals" ... So I sort of dig the entire thing, it's different, creative, and gives the term "wardrobe malfunction" a whole new set of possibilities. Which is sort of what I want to address. These looks don't give me so much a "Why?" thought bubble as "How?" one.. The photo I saw this morning that originated today's post I couldn't use because it's copyrighted, but here's a link.. I chose to use the photo to the right instead because I thought it was entertaining how easily you can compare her to one of those yarn knit toilet paper cover dolls your grandmother probably has. But anyhow, my question is how does she get around in some of this stuff? Like I know there's a team of people whose sole purpose in her entourage is to lead her around like the three blind mice when she's out and about, but like physically some of it just perplexes me. If you saw the the photo in the link you may have noticed that the descriptor says she's leaving London's Zuma Restaurant... Leaving? How the hell'd she get in? I'm picturing her kneeling onto a skateboard and being rolled through the door for clearance.. which I think is pretty creative... but who knows what these people come up with to get her in and out of places with this stuff on... And how long in advance do ya wonder they have to plan for how to get her in-this or outta-that... I don't know, but so far she's still alive, no report on the number of injuries sustained by those around her or how many chandeliers have met their fate, but I suppose somebody's doin' something right..

So I Guess I'm a PC Afterall..

Meet my new computer.. the Sony NW Series Notebook supreme. I didn't plan on getting a new computer this week, but my Dell wasn't really cutting the mustard these days and although I've been holding out for the holy grail Macbook Pro, I suppose that day will come. Today's purchase was more of a give-Bill-Gates-one-more-chance combined with a supply and demand type of scenario. But nonetheless I'm pretty chipper with my purchase. It's nice having a notebook that doesn't warrant doing arm exercises to carry from place to place within the house and that isn't lagging every five minutes from desperately needing a performance update. So hats off to Sony, and Microsoft, as Windows 7 is proving to be a fairly smooth ride as well. Cheers to my new PC!

Top 5 Things I Never Want to Hear About AGAIN.. EVER

1. Conrad Murray: Umm seriously this guy and the entire story is about to lull me into a propofol coma of my own. Yes he's a doctor. Yes he probably shouldn't have been injecting 50 year old pop stars with intravenous anesthetics. But let's be for real, Michael Jackson has/had more money than Oprah, if he wanted to be injected with some illegal shizz, he was gonna be. Pull his license for bein' a shitty doctor, but he didn't kill Michael Jackson. Michael Jackson killed Michael Jackson. For Christ's sake people has everyone forgotten EVERYTHING that happened before that day.. the man's face was fallin' off, com'on... seriously?

2. John Mayer's "Racial Slur": As a fellow wit-enthusiast I have a great deal of sympathy for where John Mayer saw this joke landing. He simply missed his target. Move on.

3. Anything about Jennifer Anniston, her "feud" with Angelina or her alleged secret meet ups with Brad: Do people have no self respect at all? I mean don't you find yourself feeling like that friend that's always convincing your other friend that the guy who dumped her like six years ago was totally crazy for doing it and still wants her back if only she'd let him have her -- Even though you know that she's really a needy, sappy, middle-aged woman, who should really get her crap together or hit the fertility bank 'cause things ain't lookin' up.
Don'tcha?

4. Justin Bieber: This kid... wow.. don't even get me started on this kid.. Did he fall from the sky? Like seriously did Disney like make him in a underground lair in Narnia and shoot him out of a cannon into the western hemisphere wearing a beanie, some airwalks, and an Ed Hardy shirt.. Where did this kid come from? And what on earth is so appealing about anything he does? Granted I'm not a thirteen year old girl, but he's not that cute, his songs sound like Jesse McCartney ripoffs and in my day we liked our young hearththrobs in groups.. you know Backstreet, N'Sync, NKOTB, etc... I mean hey, even the Jonas Brothers come in threes. Who does this kid think he is? He needs a posse of matching, semi-interesting mini-man boys and then maybe I'll consider paying attention to him for like a minute...

5. Simon Monjack: Okay so I'm not saying I'm like psychic or anything.. but well ya, I kinda am.. Because had I had this blog a few months ago you would have read me talking about a clip I saw on TMZ literally a week before Brittany Murphy's death, in which she and this large plumber-looking, balding man are standing in line to check into the airport. Maybe I was behind the times but I'd NEVER heard or seen head nor tails of this guy until then. And when they said it was her husband I nearly fell outta my chair. However I immediately I began feeling guilty for judging him that way and thought, you know, he's probably a really great guy and good for her for choosing someone for love, but then they moved from behind the counter and I was like "Dear Lord, Brittany Murphy looks like the crypt keeper!" I mean she was like all of 85 pounds, it was crazy. But needless to say when she passed away I was like holy crap, I sorta called that. But back to this guy -- he's weird I'll give you that, but the last thing I'm gonna do is give him his 15 minutes over her tragic death.. He's not even trying to be a famewhore over this thing so people need to back off and quit trying to make the whole deal something it's not. She was sick, it was sad, she'll be missed, The end.

Quote of the Week

Queen Joan: "The only thing nice about Victoria Beckham is she nevers gives anybody the middle finger 'cause it's always down her throat."

Lost & Found

Love it or hate, confused or mesmerized, intrigued or fed up -- no matter what you think of LOST, fact is I am a no holds barred, hands-down, die hard LOSTie, and since this is the final season I am not only severely engulfed in all things LOST but am anxiously awaiting the bittersweet day in which I can look upon all five seasons worth of nay sayers, raise one eyebrow, pierce them with a judging stare and share what I believe to be an inevitable moment of shame for those who've discounted what I believe to be the greatest show ever written. But until that day arrives I am along for the beautiful and sometimes patience-trying ride that is LOST.

Had this blog begun earlier I'd have covered the earlier episodes this season but since the time is nigh I will skip all the "what's this temple thing" rigamarole and just get to this week's episode.

"The Lighthouse" -- So we're four episodes in and although not a lot, if any, has been fully revealed of the promised final season wrap-up.. it is notable to point out that (and excuse me if I'm being blunt) NOTHING on LOST is ever a one trick pony reveal, if you don't know that by now then you haven't been watching.

*(Venturing off subject but stay with me because this needs to be said)*

What I mean is that everything up to now has been a cumulative revelation, bits and pieces that lead to that ah-ha moment. In fact, in my opinion that very attribute is what makes this show so appealing. If I wanted week to week action I'd be watching 24. The nail biting for LOST doesn't lie in the riveting music, wow-ing cameos, or cheesy lines.. it is meticulously calculated and in a week between episodes one can lose themselves to multiple theories, some of them outrageous and some verging on insane, but when it all comes down to it, if you've followed the plot from the beginning it is virtually undeniable that Carlton Cuse & Damon Lindelof are some creative and very brilliant gentlemen.. if only I were a fly on that wall.. seriously folks.. they have developed an amazingly delicate web here.

Okay so give me your hand and help me down off my soapbox and let's talk about this week's episode...

Loved it, mainly because it felt so old school... I can never express enough how much I love Hurley's comic relief and how it takes me to this little place where I feel like he is speaking for all of us watching.. No Ben, which is always a bummer, but we got a lot of Jacob and that's rare, especially since the focus has been on the Man in Black aka Not-Locke, Smocke, UnLocke, or my personal favorite Mocke. Enjoyed the entire Alice In Wonderland continued theme and though I felt that Jack was a little overacted this week, I'm totally up for the whole Chance-to-be-a-better-Dad-to-your-son-than-yours-was-to-you lesson/scenario.

Now for the best part:

Let's talk theories --

1. I think Juliet is going to be David's mother, it only makes sense, I mean the kid is approximately 12/13 so that means he was conceived around the time Jack would have been in med school and since she was never shown we have to assume it's because she is another islander who crossed paths with Jack in his flash-sideways life. And who do we know that's a doctor?.. ahem..

2. I know this is a little far back, but I think the whole Miles hears Juliet from the dead moment was not realized for it's true meaning.. Don'tcha think "It worked" could mean that she's speaking from her alternate reality life in switch she is... wait for it... STILL ALIVE

3. I keep wanting to lean towards the idea that there is going to be a switch in power (i.e. Jacob is really the bad guy and MIB is the good guy) mainly because I keep seeing this whole wolf in sheep's clothing kinda act everytime we get the skinny on what Jacob's up to.. something just doesn't fit there, plus I feel like John Locke was so amazing and he couldn't possibly have been a candidate for evil.

4. About the magic mirror machine -- I saw three images when he was turning the dial, Jack's childhood home, one looked to me like the temple on the island, however it could have been an asian style home in which case it has something to do with the Kwon's probably, also we saw the reflection of the church where Sawyer was first approached by Jacob as a kid, so when Jack said "I haven't lived in that house since I was kid" that says to me that if we're seeing the places where Jacob intersected their lives, then SHEPHARD isn't Jack, because Jacob approached him at the hospital, so who else was home when Jack was a kid that might've met our friend Jacob... I'll give you a hint, he's been talked about in the all of this season's episodes but never seen, and his name is sorta biblical... oh and his last name is SHEPHARD... :)

Lastly: Don't know if you guys read The Lost Diary but you should because it's awesome and anyhow I was doing some comment browsing earlier and found a few cool thoughts to share.

Alice in Wonderland Theme
- Scene with David Jack talks about having read him an Alice in Wonderland Book
- When he goes to David's Mom's house to look for him the key is under a white rabbit
- The title of the Dharma Station "The Looking Glass" with symbol of a rabbit
- Destruction of mirrors or "looking glass" where Jacob could saw into their lives

Significance of 108
- 108 is the total of all the LOST numbers
- The name beside 108 on the dial in the lighthouse was Wallace, crossed out
- Charles Wallace was a character in "A Wrinkle in Time" series who was a psychic kid (Walter anyone)
- The stories were about space/time travel
- Within the stories was a creature called "The Black Thing" and references to turning points in time and battles between good and evil


Best Quote of Lost:

Season One - Pilot Episode - Locke teaching Walt how to play backgammon, "There are two sides, two players. One is light, the other is dark." And when Walt asks if they had dice a long time ago Locke tells him "But theirs weren't made of plastic. Their dice were made of bones."

The Beginning

Hello Everyone and Welcome to my new blog! I'm pretty stoked to have this finally up and running as it has been in the works for some time (if you define in the works as in-my-head + chronic procrastination) --Either way I'm live and in the blog world now so there's no goin' back.

First things first, a shout out to my brother and (sometimes) co-blogger Austin, without whom the phrase "Let's Be For Real" would never have been created let alone come to be the title of this blog.

If you read the title and didn't know how to take it, let me clarify, this is not a ghetto-Maury Show blog, "Let's be For Real" is no street corner hoochie-short wearin' diva tagline... The phrase came to be one summer when Austin and I lived together and found ourselves constantly consumed in celeblogs... these were the pre-iPhone days when TMZ was accessed by typing it into your browser, rather than the tap of an index finger, so we spent an excessive amount of time laptopin' it up and checking for the latest slice of crazy to hit the web. Go Fug Yourself became a fave (if you haven't been there, definitely check it out) as well as others like The Superficial, Mr. Paparazzi, and of course good ole TMZ.

We would spend hours laughing at the hilarious postings about has-beens, famewhores and everybody's favorite -- the current but tragically scandalous celebutante. We'd end nearly every laugh fest with a gossip fest of our own and couldn't help but think that when it came down to it, the stuff we said in our little apartment was nine outta ten funnier than anything we'd just read. So it became a ritual: read the story, then talk about the blunt but hilarious truth behind it, always beginning with "Let's be for real.." as in "Let's be for real, Michael Lohan started the whole crazy-dad/creepo/my-kids-will-have-to-wear-paper-bags-over-their-heads-for-life movement, so John Gosselin really needs to get in line and hope he takes him under his wing"

It was then that we began using it in everyday scenarios, thus growing its popularity among everyone we know. Note: If you haven't heard one of us say this at some point, we probably don't like you and begin sentences this way when you're not around because they're about you.
Before we knew it, it was an all the time kind of thing and we thought "we really gotta jump on this blog thing and create something of our own" But it slowly and sadly became one of those things you only just ever talk about.

Four years later here we are. This is new for both of us, so bear with us and hang in there. My plan is to begin this as a place to talk about things that are going on in several media realms, providing little snapshots into our take on the stuff that's happening. And eventually I want us to post on a multi-daily basis and have you laughing from morning to night.. Think of us as an online text radio comedy show. We're here to entertain but we'll mostly be talking about funny stuff we've read, watched, or come into contact with over the course of our day/week.

I will also have some additional pages including a series of "My Favs" page where I'll talk about and provide links to entertaining websites I discover and special pages dedicated to the shows I watch regularly as well as celebrities whose drama I can't get enough of.

Stay tuned for some good times and for God's sake put down that rice cake, we're gonna laugh those rolls right off!